i cant listen to avril lavigne..
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I’d need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I’m alone
And the bed where you lie
is made up on your side
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you’re gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you’re gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you’re gone
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
I’ve never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
they lie on my floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you’re gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you’re gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And when you’re gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah Yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe, I need to feel you here with me
Yeah
When you’re gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you’re gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you’re gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you….
so much wanted to talk to you..sms you… wanted to hear ur voice.. wanted us to be happy again… stay in happiness again…
but i have to stop myself… i dun wanna force you although the temptation is high….
each time i feel like calling or sms you.. it feels like a bullet shoot into my heart… shattered into pieces..
before we are happy lovers.. now we are strangers to one another…
how much it hurts me .. u dun noe…
i miss you very much… if only u noe.. if only u read this..
i still love you..
i really do..
so much of tears i’ve cried.. i cant able to hide my feelings anymore..it kills me everytime i think of u…
i dont know whther you feel the same way.. if only u were here to see how crappy i look now….
i’m sorry for everything..
words can’t describe how i feel now..
every part of my body collapse..
my heart shattered into pieces..
when the person whom you loved dearly with all ur heart n soul..
suddenly just careless of whatever you do..
as if nothing had happened between us before..
it hurts….. so….. bad…….
every nite i cry myself to sleep..
thinking why does this happened to me..
why cant the moment past.. and learn from mistakes i’ve made..
every rship has its ups and downs..
its so suffering that i just wish to end the agony that’s haunting me every nite….
thinking about the past..
everywhere, anywhere, everywhere i go… there’s alwiz memories between and you………………….
crying myself in the room.. all alone.. nobody to speak to.. nobody know my feelings..
except for my mom..consoled me.. sayang me…sayang is all i needed rite now..
i wanna turn a new leaf..
i desperately wanna change …
i dun wanna rush into things anymore..
i dun wanna control u anymore..
i dun wanna force you to do things which you dun like anymore..
i dun wanna easily get jealous anymore..
i dun wanna easily feel insecure anymore..
all the bad behaviours you’ve said to me i really want to change..
i’m willing and i want.
but u have to understand.. it’s not easy for me to suddenly change from bad to good..
it takes time.. all it needs is a little more patience with me… stay with me… understand me.. then i would learn…
its all seems meaningless to you rite now.
.everything that i’ve said to you doesnt make sense anymore.. …. it hurts.. honey…………………..how could you do this to me…i know deep down.. you still love me..you say things just to hurt my feelings.. but u dont mean it… u dont mean it….. no you dont……i know you dont…
you wouldnt careless when im pouring my heart out to you..
the way you reply me with short answers..
not answering my calls..
did you ever put urself in my position if i replied to you like this.. ? uh honey..?..
this is the lowest point of my life………
i never felt this way before…………..
i feel very sad…………… i cant type anymore….
i love you
i know i hurt u too many times
i know we argued way too much
i know whatever i say or did always ended up with an argument
i know i’m not a good girlfriend
i know i dont always treat u right
i know the things that you dont allow or dislike me to do
i know the things you always warned me about
i know you’r hurting now..
i know everything about you..
i wanna understand you
i wanna mend the situation we are in
i wanna end the suffering we are in
please take me back..
I just hope everything to be just as before..
I know im asking you too many times..
begging you..
pleaded you u take me back..
im willing to change my bad behaviour
im always thinking on the positive side..
but the thought of you leaving me i cant seem to take it
we’ve been thru alot honey..
a lot…. way too much..
we just cant let go of each other..
it hurts… hurt so much..
the pain is unbearable and i cant take it.. please forgive me…
please give me one last chance to prove it to you..
please love me back..
i know deep down you still love me..
you dont mean whatever you say..
you say is just to hurt me.. to stop me from loving you..
i know you feel the pain inside..
let’s just gv us another one last chance..
we had so much together honey… just dont think of the bad memories that only will hurt us.. will hurt you..
i screwed our rship big time…BIG TIME…
i kept blaming myself.. kept blaming and blaming..
until i lost my sense of direction…
until i think of you all the time..
the tears that i shed it’s all worth while..
though i always hide it and put a fake smile..
deep down.. im crushed…
crushed with the feeling i’ve failed in relatioship..
everynite i cried myself to sleep..
reminiscing of the past .. whatever things that we did together..
nobody knows.. nobody knew the pain… the feeling inside of me..
i never want ppl to know.. but they knew i was hurting..
i want to tell the truth to ppl.. that i am a bad girlfriend..
i mean it honey.. every word i said.. the tears seems to be rolling down my cheek now..
every mogning i tried to hide with the swelling at the bottom of my eyes..
you are a great boyfriend to me..
you treat me right.. you always pampered me..
sayang me.. buy me things like mp3.. take care of me.. bring me go gai gai..
treat me good food..introduce me to ur frens.. send me good mails.. give me good songs to listen.. wipe the tears of my eyes.. ask me to silent down.. not cry too much.. hug me.. kiss me.. pat my head.. sayang me.. honey..
i take things for granted now.. i knoe and im really really reallly reallly sorry..
i meant it from the bottom of my heart every single word i’ve said….
please hear me out..
i love you..
i love you..
i love you honey….
feel me honey.. feel the things im trying to tell you…
dont feel numb towards me please…….
think positive honey..
think of us..
think of the time we’ve been together..
think of us having late supper in McD..
think of us in Danga Bay..
think of us walking happily and holding hands in Jonker..
think of the things we did together..
think of the stupid little promises we both made to each other before..
think of the time we had together when we held in each other arms.. telling each other how much we loved each other..
think of the time we celebrate New Year in McD.. u smsed me.. u wished me and that was very sweet..
think of the words you said to me..
think of the first day we met..
think of the time we play bowling…. the past time we had…
the nite we were in Genting.. the place we first met……………..the early morning we had our morning walks…… only the both of us….. the beautiful scenery of sun rise we both witnesses with our own eyes…………we hugged… we made promises….. to be together……forever……. Kang and Kate……….
Final exam..
OMG can die………………………
Can’t imagine I’m answering my final foundation papers in two weeks time!
Final in two weeks time wei!!!!
That’s like so…………………………………………motherfreaking fast ler………………….I’m soooooooooooooo not ready yet……………………………………………………………………….
In a blink of an eye, It feels like I had just started my sem and now i have to freaking answer all the paper. What the hell.
Honestly, this sem i feel damn bloody malas. Everything even to the bits like do assignment I can take my own bloody sweet time to drag it as long as i could until to the last minute then only i’d start to regret of the time wasted instead of doing the ass. The feeling of damn bersalah would suddenly emerged of the the little ‘crime’ i did. ahhaha
So what i did?????
zZzZzZZZZZZZzzzzZZZzzZzZZzZZzzzzzzzz…………………………..
the weather wei…. is killing me!!!!!!!!!! kill the weather!!!!! hahaha. how often u can have nice weather everyday where u can hibernate all day long without worrying anything and putting assignment at the back of ur head??…Ok. Don’t argue. Don’t feel the urge of doing that’s all. TOld u! im pure malas this sem! Ahh… just aiming for pass pass pass… To hell with foundation la. U see la! This kinda attitude i have !
O.o..
Oh Noooooooooooo.. Cannot cannot.
Must really sit down in library and get my ass moving else i’ll regret man!
Anyway, Honey to the bee is sitting for his final paper today.
Pressure , pressure certainly can feel the pressure .. He has heaps of info to memorize and i think at one point the facts seems to be saturated in his full-loaded brain.
Very pity him.
I hope he’ll do well like he always do coz I know he’s capable of anything like he had proven to me in the previous sem. ALWAYS complaning and more complains from him but when the results is out it ALWAYS stoned me in the end! ALWAYS lorh!!! Hehe. Support honey all the way ok. 
Remember my advise honey.
muakss